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Why do we fail to control our-self ?

HYA (1)

Due to many thoughts patterns that confuses us to be (Self-determined), We forget all the promises we do with our-self, we start identifying our-self with thoughts therefore we start reacting according to the thoughts, If thought says you are an intelligent person one starts feeling a very intelligent person, if next thought says you are bad person one starts feeling bad therefore after too much struggle one completely breaks down and stop living the life.

How some thoughts become numerous thoughts, due to no mental one pointedness therefore all energy is distributed in many branches.

This general problem has become major or the main problem to today’s human life even very well educated, very wealthy and healthy people are unable to live the life. Life is completely waste if it is not being lived as one wants to live, it can be understood only when there is peace in the mind nothing will become everything with peaceful state of mind and everything will become nothing will non-peaceful state of mind.

When we look at this more carefully, we begin to understand that the failure to control ourselves is not simply a lack of discipline. It is a deeper imbalance between the mind, the ego, and awareness.

From a psychological perspective, self-control is not unlimited. It depends on mental energy and attention. When we constantly make decisions, resist impulses, or manage stress, this energy becomes exhausted. This is why, after a long or demanding day, it becomes harder to stay focused or make balanced choices.

In yoga, this same condition is understood in a different way. The mind becomes restless not because we are weak, but because it is constantly engaged with thoughts, desires, and past impressions. The more we identify with these movements, the less control we experience.

Another important reason we fail to control ourselves is misunderstanding control itself. Most people try to control the mind by force. They try to suppress thoughts, emotions, or habits. But suppression creates resistance. And resistance often leads to stronger reactions later.

Real control in yoga is not suppression — it is awareness.

When awareness is present, we begin to see patterns clearly:

  • how thoughts arise
  • how emotions react
  • how habits repeat
  • how the ego tries to protect identity

This observation creates a small distance between the observer and the reaction. That distance is where control begins.

Without this awareness, the mind operates automatically. Psychology also describes this as a split between impulsive reactions and conscious control. When attention is low, impulses take over more easily.

In yogic terms, this is the influence of the ego and conditioning. The ego does not want to lose control, so it keeps repeating familiar patterns. Even when those patterns create discomfort, they feel safe because they are known.

This is why change feels difficult.

Through regular practice, especially meditation and pranayama, the mind gradually becomes steadier. Breath becomes slower, reactions become softer, and awareness becomes more continuous. Yoga does not remove the ego instantly, but it reduces its dominance.

Over time, self-control becomes less about effort and more about clarity.

You no longer have to force yourself constantly. Instead, you begin to act from a place that is less reactive and more stable. This shift is subtle but important. It changes the way decisions are made, the way emotions are experienced, and the way life is lived.

It is also important to understand that self-control is not about perfection. Even with practice, there will be moments of distraction, emotional reaction, or imbalance. These moments are not failures. They are part of observation.

Each time we notice, we return. Each time we return, awareness becomes stronger. In this way, the practice of yoga becomes a continuous process of understanding the self — not controlling it forcefully, but aligning with it more naturally.

When awareness deepens, control is no longer something we struggle to maintain. It becomes something that arises on its own.

Conclusion- Daily meditation practice specially (self-inquiry meditation) can bring peace of mind which will open a new door to feel the life within you ?.

Written by- Himanshu joshi
Date- 10/11/2017
www.himalayanyogaashram.com

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